People who irritate concert aficionados

The kind of people who ruin your concert evening
You did it
We belong to a lucky generation indeed. On the advent of television and radio somehow many had lost out on the joy of dropping into live concerts and living the much alive music. But boy are we lucky these days to have shows one after the next lining our weekends and weekdays making it a Herculean task to choose between the shows.And after having devotedly planning our schedules we reach there in the fullest zest that can turn into a disappointment. Forget the artist disappointing us, we can always bear it. But what is intolerable is that gang of people who had probably come to the concert to escape either their grinding in-laws or desire to irk us deliberately with inane activities. I am sure you would have come across one of them.
Reviewer
They might be seated right on the front row, deceiving you into believing that they are the number one fan of the particular artist. But wait till the performance begins. And then they will display their true colours. They suddenly don the hats of a NY Times reviewer. But here they review everything except the performance. Clothes, accessories, not of the performer but of their neighbour’s, et al come under the purview of their review.
Gadget baap
It is agreeable that the person might be a tech junkie. Then why didn’t they listen to their favourite singer on tube? All throughout the show they spend recording or clicking it, seldom bothering to look out of their 3 inch screens. Probably they assume that they are doing the online world a favour by recording and later uploading it online. But mister, you are not doing anyone a favour!
Slurp along
They do nod their heads and appropriately gasp at the right situation. But suddenly we find a huge slurping noise and an accompaniment of loud munching. Do not even dare to turn around to investigate the direction of the sounds. You may meet a horrifying image of someone exhibiting their unattractive mouth anatomy. They love the noise in the atmosphere and apparently wish to contribute some to it!
Nightingale of India
Their chances of becoming a playback singer could be a cinch. They would have arrived at the venue in all splendour to derive some motivation. But why oh why did they have to sing along and ruin our evening? We are not asking them to confine their talents within the bathrooms, but it can definitely wait till the concert is over. After which maybe they can resume their mellifluous renditions to an empty auditorium.
Zzzz...
Tiring job or family or a stressful life has certainly taken a toll on their lives. This becomes the reason for them to escape to the concert, only to blissfully fall asleep and snore loudly which may not be so much of a bliss to the others. We liked it when Jughead did it. But you are not Jughead and neither do we take delight in random strangers dozing off on our shoulders.
ranjitha.g@timesgroup.com